


Teenage Shenanigans

by uhohspagittios



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Female Harry Potter, Female Ron Weasley, Gen, Genberbend, M/M, Male Hermione Granger, Modern AU, Non-magical AU, The Golden Trio, Y'all this is a mess, lots of real life issues later on, text
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-05-26 16:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15004355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uhohspagittios/pseuds/uhohspagittios
Summary: Teenagehood is tough for all. The awkward phases mixed with stress and hormones often lead to disaster but alas teenagehood is inevitable and we must all go through it. This is the story of three friends and their struggles of adolescence through one group chat.





	1. Spiders, responsibility, and budding romance

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Enjoy the story and feel free to leave any constructive criticism in the comments･ᴗ･ (I haven't written fan fiction in a long time so I'm rusty)

**Pooter  
** **[Sent video to Golden Trio Chat (∩`⍘´)⊃━☆ﾟ.*]  
** Nature is wild 

****

**Hermes  
** That's...interesting 

****

**Ronnie  
** How dare you. I take you into my home, give you food and love and this is how you treat me? 

****

**Pooter  
** I don’t live with you? 

****

**Hermes  
** It's just a little spider 

****

**Ronnie  
** Just a spider jUST A SPIDER 

****

**Pooter  
** Now you’ve done it 

****

**Hermes  
** … 

****

**Ronnie  
** Spiders are the actual spawn of satan. They strike fear in their enemies. One look and they could kill an adult human. They not only kill but break families apart. One time my second cousin and her husband had an argument about a spider and now theyre divorced. And they have 8 legs? You know what else has 8 legs, lobsters and guess what? Theres 6 letters in lobster and six letters in spiders. Guess what else has six letters- monster. 666. Spiders are the literal devil. 

****

**Hermes  
** That-  
That doesn't even make sense  


****Pooter  
** I got lost after ‘are’ **

****

****

****

********

**Ronnie  
** You guys dont understand the dangers of spiders 

****

**Pooter  
** Well in other news someone broke a window of the parks public bathroom 

****

**Hermes  
** Was this someone you? 

****

**Pooter  
** What no  
I thought you put more trust in me

****

**Ronnie  
** But it was you 

****

**Pooter  
** Well he doesn't need to know that and hypothetically if it were me it would have been an aCCIDENT 

****

**Hermes  
** And what exactly are you going to tell your parents? Hypothetically, of course 

****

**Pooter  
** Thats easy. I just don't tell them 

****

**Hermes  
** Harriet Lily Potter 

****

**Ronnie  
** Oh shit he said the full name 

****

**Hermes  
** You better tell your parents and take responsibility or I swear to God I will call your mother. 

****

**Pooter  
** How do you know my moms number? 

****

**Hermes  
** We’re in the same book club 

****

**Pooter  
** W h at 

****

**Roonie  
** I feel conflicted 

****

**Pooter  
** Please dont call my mother  
Shes a scary woman

****

**Hermes  
** Either you tell them or I do  


****Pooter  
** ** Fi n e  
I thought we were friends Hermes  
Mates  
buddies  
Comrades

********

********

**Hermes  
** You need to learn to take responsibility 

****

****

**Pooter  
** I take responsibility many times 

****

****

**Ronnie  
** Mate  
You usually run away from your responsibilities 

****

****

**Pooter  
** You too Ronnie  
I feel so betrayed  
**[Sent Imagine to Golden Trio Chat (∩`⍘´)⊃━☆ﾟ.*]**

****

****

****

**Ronnie  
** Were do you even find that imagine  
  
**Hermes  
** Where* 

****

****

**Ronnie  
** I will throw hands 

****

****

**Pooter  
** Do it  
You won’t 

****

****

**Ronnie  
** 3 exactly behind the school 

****

****

**Hermes  
** No 

****

****

**Ronnie  
** I will personally come to your house and fight you 

****

****

**Hermes  
** I swear to god Ronnie 

****

****

**Ronnie  
** I’ll do it I swear 

****

****

**Hermes  
** Please don’t 

****

****

**Pooter  
** Ronnie? Ronnie? Oh my god she’s doing it 

****

****

**Hermes  
** That’s highly unlikely  
But now I’m slightly scared  
—————————————————————— 

****

****

Hermes sighed as he ran a hand through his bushy hair. His phone was left discarded on the bed on his left as he tried to focus on the paper in front of him. The paper filled with red marks of his own doing. Right as he was about to revise the paper once more he heard something collide with his window. 

“What the-“ he looked over at the window and saw something collide with it again. He pursed his lips and thought about whether or not he wanted to see what it was. Once again something smacked his window with more force than the other two. He quickly got up from his seat and walked towards his window to open it. Once he opened it he noticed a redhead with rocks in her hand aiming another rock at the window.

“Ronnie! What are you doing here?” He asked loudly to her. 

“I’m here to fight. Come down.” She loudly replied back.

“What no! And how did you even get here so quickly? You live on the other side of town.”

“That’s for me to know and you to find out.”

Hermes rolled his eyes and went to close his windows before he heard her yell ‘wait’.

“What?”

“Can I come inside, I’m really tired.” She dropped all the rocks in her arms and looked up with a pleading look. Hermes stayed quiet for a while which caused a slight panic in the redhead.

“Fine but use the front door like a normal person.”

“Thank you!”

The two stayed in the living room and talked. The conversation started with how Ronnie got here and quickly escalated to whether or not fish could dream.

“I mean why not they have brains and they must be thinking of something.” Ronnie explained while moving her hands rapidly. She sat on the floor with her back on the front on the leather couch. 

“Yes but their only instinct is to survive,” Hermes replied back. He sat next to Ronnie and gave her a questioning look. “And what would a fish even dream about?”

“I don’t know, maybe like seaweed.”

“Seaweed?” He asked with a small laugh. 

“I don’t know! Maybe they dream about the kelp and shit. Maybe they dream about how it is up in the air- don’t laugh at me!” She smacked her hand on his upper arm but it didn’t do anything to stop his laughing. 

“I’m sorry- sorry but it’s just- out of everything in the ocean, you choose seaweed?” Ronnie replied by sticking her tongue out at him. “Real mature Ronnie.” 

Right as she was about to reply to his remark the clock rang signaling that another hour passed.

“Oh, shit monkeys. I need to get back home before my mom realizes I’m not there.”

“Wait did you sneak out?”

“Yes, but that’s not the point. The point is I need to get back so she doesn’t realize I’m gone.” She quickly stood up and started to head towards the door. Right as she was about to open it, Hermes gently grabbed her arm.

“Wait.” She looked over at him and slightly turned her head sideways then made a ‘mh’ sound. They both stayed quiet for what seemed like an eternally. She felt her cheeks heat up by the closeness of him.  
“Don’t forget your jacket. It’s supposed to get colder.”

“Oh-uh... thanks.” She grabbed her jacket and gave him a small smile before leaving the house and heading back home.

—————————————————————

**Ronbun  
** I am royalty screwed 

****

****

**Harryberry  
** Spill the tea hon 


	2. Sports, pets, and gathering courage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope y'all enjoy this chapter.

****

**Ronnie  
** Do you guys want to meet up tomorrow for a game of football?

****

**Pooter  
** oh hell yes  
sign me the heck up

****

**Hermes  
** I can’t  
I’m going on a family trip tomorrow

****

**Pooter  
** How convenient

****

**Hermes  
** I actually do have a family trip tomorrow

****

**Ronnie  
** Well have fun at whatever you’re doing  
Be home by 8 

****

**Hermes  
** Thank you Ronnie

****

**Ronnie  
** No problemo my dear friend

_________________________________________

“Do you think he likes me?” Ronnie asked Harry as she gave a small kick to the football which made it move a centimeter. The two girls were in a local park. It seemed like they were the only ones in the park, well aside the party going on the other side of the park.

“Well, it's pretty obvious.” Harry responded back. Her messy black hair was pulled back into a ponytail and her glasses were replaced with contacts. 

“So he doesn’t.” The redhead’s shoulders sagged as she let out a sad sigh. Harry gave the girl a flabbergasted look. 

“Wait- no that's not what- he- wow you are so oblivious.” She shook her head and grabbed the football. She rested it on her hip and continued to look at Ronnie. “Think about it, Ronnie. Like really think about it. Notice how he acts around you compared to others. There are so many signs that I could write a whole novel! With a sequel and a prequel! And it isn’t just him, it’s you too.” She waved a finger in front of the redheads face. “One of you need to make a move because I am not losing the bet.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I just need to just go for it, you know. I just need to go to him and say ‘Hey I like you! Let’s watch a movie!’ or something like that- wait what do you mean by bet?”

Harry waved a hand. “Don’t worry about it. Now,” she dropped the ball on the ground and gave Ronnie a big smile. “let's get to playing. It’s getting late.”

____________________________________________ 

****

**Pooter  
** I want a cat

****

**Hermes  
** You already have a cat

****

**Pooter  
** I want another cat

****

**Hermes  
** Why?

****

**Pooter  
** I want to give out more love

****

**Ronnie  
** You’re capable of love?  
This is news to me

****

**Pooter  
** I give plenty of love to everyone!  
WHat else do you want from me?

****

**Ronnie  
** A flute concert but that's beside the point

****

**Hermes  
** The whole love thing aside, why do you want another cat?

****

**Pooter  
** Because

****

**Hermes  
** Because?

****

**Ronnie  
** Let the woman get a cat Hermes!

****

**Pooter  
** Yeah Hermes let me get a cat  
Im going to go to the shelter now 

****

**Hermes  
** Don’t you need to be 18 to adopt?

****

**Pooter  
** Shit you’re right  
I’ll just get a fake ID

****

**Hermes  
** NO

****

**Ronnie  
** YES  
FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS HARRY

****

**Hermes  
** Faking any government documents is HIGHLY illegal

****

**Pooter  
** Who’s going to stop me?

****

**Hermes  
** Your dad is LITERALLY a cop

****

**Pooter  
** Exactly  
I have someone in the inside

****

**Hermes  
** Please don’t do it  
I’d rather not have to see you in prison

****

**Ronnie  
** Dont worry Harbear  
I’ll do it with you 

****

**Hermes  
** NO  
_______________________________________

****

**Ronnie  
** I hate everyone in my house  
Except Ginny cause shes cool  
And my parents  
But everyone else is trash

****

**Pooter  
** ????

****

**Hermes  
** Context? 

****

**Ronnie  
** The twins came over today and they wont stop bugging me  
Im literally hiding in the garden  
I dont know what they want and I dont want know

****

**Pooter  
** Maybe they just miss you?

****

**Ronnie  
** Or they're trying to test some new pranks  
And i don't want anything to do with that

****

**Hermes  
** How long are they going to be there?

****

**Ronnie  
** Until tomorrow I think  
Someone end my misery 

****

**Pooter  
** Maybe you just need prince charming to save you ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

****

**Ronnie  
** Harry you better stop or I swear to every god of every religion I will hunt you down

****

**Hermes  
** Im sorry, Im confused. Did something happen?  
****

**Pooter  
** Oh something happened

****

**Ronnie  
** HARRY SHUT YOUR RACIALLY AMBIGUOUS MOUTH

****

**Pooter  
** Its time to step it up Ronnie  
Be the lioness we all know you are  
YOU CAN DO IT  
Or wait for another time  
I respect all of your decisions  
That being said I still have a bet to win  
byyeeeee

****

**Hermes  
** ????????

________________________________________

****

**Ronnie  
** Hey can we talk about something serious?

****

**Hermescules  
** Yeah, of course

****

**Ronnie  
** Okay uh this is going to be hard to explain  
I like you  
Like like you  
And i have for a while now

****

**[Hermescules is calling]**

**  
**

The first thing to go through Ronnie’s head while watching her phone screen change was _fuck, fuck, fuck me, fuck the twins, fuck harry, fuck life, fuck that crow thats watching me, fuck everyone_. She cleared her throat and slid the answer button.

“H-hello?” Fuck her voice cracked.

“Hey.” He sounded normal

“So-uh whats up?”

“I just wanted to say the feeling is very mutual and it seemed weird to do this in text.” and this wasn't?

“Oh-OH! That's good. Now that knocks the fear of rejection out of the way… so now what?”

“Well we could go to the theater.”

“Yeah that would be nice.”

“Saturday at 7?” 

“Yeah yeah. I would like that.”

“Okay, well talk to you later.”

“See you later alligator.” As soon as she heard the call end she jumped up and yelled, “YES!” She clutched her phone to her chest and grinned. _That actually wasn’t so bad._


	3. Movies, mental health, and broken glasses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! I've decided to update this story every Thursday (or around Wednesday/Friday) so heads up.  
> (Also TW- there is description of panic attacks and mentions of abuse later on the chapter)

****

**Ronnie  
** Hey remember when Incredibles first came out?

****

**Hermescules  
** No since I was around 3 when it came out but carry on

****

**Ronnie  
** Well the sequel is coming out friday so I thought that maybe we can go and see it?

****

**Hermescules  
** I don’t see why we couldn’t

****

**Ronnie  
** Oh i can't wait  
It's been what  
14 years

****

**Hermescules  
** If you asked me they should have waited another year so it could tie to the quote from the first movie ‘too late, 15 years too late’

****

**Ronnie  
** The devil's working hard but Pixar is working harder

****

**Hermescules  
** I'm sorry, what?

****

**Ronnie  
** Nevermind  
Hey have you heard from Harry?  
I sent out our daily good morning greetings but she hasn’t responded

****

**Hermescules  
** Actually I have not, which is kind of worrying  
_______________________ 

“Mom! Have you seen my yellow jacket?”  
Harry asked as she walked throughout the house, trying to find her jacket. 

“I believe it’s in the cupboard under the stairs, love.” Answered a muffled voice that belonged to her lovely, but terrifying mother.

“The cupboard?” She repeated softly. She then started to slowly walk towards the cupboard that she would always avoid, for personal reasons, fidgeting with the hem of her striped shirt. Once she reached the reached the door, she gripped the handle tightly, twisting it and slowly pulling it towards her. 

The squeaking of the door made her heart beat faster. It was just like the one at- no it’s nothing like that one. She was with her parents who love her and care for her, so why was she so scared? 

Once the whole cupboard was exposed she scanned it as quickly as she could. She found her jacket and took it out before slamming the door shut. Her back was to the door. She felt as if there was an elephant sitting on her chest. She grabbed her hand on her upper arms, nails digging into her flesh, she felt as her breath was being taken away, her chest was burning and she felt her eyes being engulfed in tears. _I’m I dying? Why does everything hurt? Please make it stop, make it stop, make it stop-_

She didn’t notice the footsteps walking down the stairs nor did she notice as a figure gasped and started to head towards her. She did, however, felt someone’s hand on her back.

“Come on sweetheart, let's go sit on the couch.” The gentle voice said. She felt herself being pushed in a direction only to end up on something comfortable. 

“You’re okay, nothing is going to hurt you, nothing is going to hurt you love.” The gentle voice said as the person rubbed small circles Harry’s back. After a while, her heartbeat became regular and she was able to breathe but was now hiccuping. She noticed that the person beside her was her mom. She rubbed her eyes and puffed out her cheeks. 

“I-I’m sorry.” She felt her mother's hands cup her face. The redhead smiled and rubbed her thumbs on her daughter’s wet stained cheeks. 

“It’s okay, you’ve done nothing wrong.” Harry sniffed and rested her head on her mother’s shoulder. Lily’s arms wrapped around her and she rocked her gently and placed a kiss. Harry’s forehead. “I love you so much, my little fawn.”

________________________________

It had been two hours and twenty-two minutes since Harry had the panic attack, as her mother had explained it to her afterward. She could hear the muffled voices of both her mother and father talking downstairs, most likely about her. Her phone kept buzzing every so often with new messages and phone calls. 

She held her round-framed glasses in her hand. She had those frames since as long as she could remember. She had them in the cupboard with the Dursleys. She had them when her parents woke from their coma. She had them when she moved back in with her parents and met her ‘uncles’. She had them when she met Ronnie and Hermes in school. Even as it had so many good memories attached to it, it had even more bad memories. Memories of spiderwebs in a small dark room, of being hurt in more ways than one, of having food taken away for punishment. 

Harry’s grip on the glasses tightened. She couldn’t see without them. She was as blind as a star-nosed mole. She needed them. Creeeek. But she had her contacts so did she really need them now? _Creeeek_. What’s the point of them? _Creeeek_. They’re old fashioned. _Creeeek_. And also very very breakable. _Cree-snap_. 

Her green eyes looked down at her palm and saw that her round framed glasses was now split in two.

“Well shit.” 

_________________________

****

**Pooter  
** Oof sorry guys, my phone was dead and I couldn’t find a charger

****

**Ronnie  
** You son of a bitch had me worried. My heart can only take so much

****

**Pooter  
** I’m sorry Ronbun

****

**Hermes  
** You really had us worried there Harriet. 

****

**Pooter  
** I know I know  
I’m really sorry guys

****

**Ronnie  
** I was about to walk to your house. Like I had my shoes on and everything 

****

**Pooter  
** I’m really sorry I worried you guys, I’m fine tho 

****

**Hermes  
** Are you sure? 

****

**Pooter  
** Positive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, I hope you all enjoyed the chapter.  
> Check out my tumblr: uhohspagittios


	4. Movie date, birthdays, and starting school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof this chapter is kinda late. I just came back from a small vacation so I haven't had enough time to write/edit a chapter (this chapter is kinda rushed/bad so sorry about that).  
> Anways, enjoy the chapter!
> 
> Oh! Also since this is an AU I’ve decided to mess around the with the ages so Harriet is the oldest in the trio rather than the youngest (for future purposes).

****

**Harryberry  
** Girl  
Are you ready for your date 

****

**Ronbun  
** No I’m not even ready to leave the house  
What if I mess up something  
Like is their edicate for watching a movie in the theater?

****

**Harryberry  
** Uhh  
Don’t talk or be on your phone when the movies going? Y’know the basic stuff 

****

**Ronbun  
** I think I’m dying 

****

**Harryberry  
** Oh shit  
Can I have your jackets 

****

**Ronbun  
** Well anyways back to my problems 

****

**Harryberry  
** we never left them 

****

**Ronbun  
** anYWaYS  
It’s almost time so wish me luck

****

**Harryberry  
** Break a leg! Oh shoot that’s for acting  
Wishing you the best of luck my lovable blue eyed friend

___________________

 

The theater was packed with people of all ages. There were adults, children, teenagers, and even a few elders. Luckily for the both of them, Hermes insisted that they came early so they would have a better chance of getting seats. However, that meant they had to watch a whole thirty minutes of previews.

“Is that a burger?” Hermes asked his date. Said date was currently eating a fairly large cheeseburger and even had a small rectangle box filled with french fries in-between her legs. 

“No?” Ronnie replied back in-between bites. 

“We could have gotten popcorn.”

“And pay all that money? I think not. You want some Sprite?” 

“I- yes.” She pulled out a small can out of her bag and gave it to him. 

___________

“That was amazing!” Ronnie exclaimed excitedly as the both of them walked out of the theater. 

“It was really worth the wait.” Hermes said as he looked down at the redhead next to him. They both decided to walk home since it wasn’t that dark. 

Throughout the whole walk, they talked about the movie and at one point talked about what brand of soap is the best. 

“Well, this was nice,” Ronnie said softly. They were currently less than a foot away from her home. “I would get closer but you know how my family is.” 

“They are a curious bunch.” 

“That’s one way to say it.” They stayed quiet for a while. Thank god they were outside because at least there was some kind of sound. Ronnie bounced on the balls of her feet while Hermes fidgeted with the end of his shirt. 

“Well, I best be going. I live quite far away from here.”

Ronnie laughed nervously, “Yeah.” God this was awkward. “It was a fun date. We should do it again.”

“Yeah. That would be nice.” They both went quiet again but this time they stared at each other, smiling like idiots. 

“I got to go.”

“Yeah yeah, me too.” Ronnie bit the inside of her cheek. She placed both of her hands of his shoulders then quickly pecked his cheek, leaving the poor boy startled.

“Haveagoodnight.” She turned around and sprinted into her house.

_______________________

****

**Ronnie  
** hAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU BEAUTIFUL HUMAN BEING

****

**Hermes  
** Happy birthday Harriet!!! 

****

**Pooter  
** A W YOU GUYS  
THANK YOU  
YA GIRL IS FINALLY 18 

****

**Ronnie  
** Girl girl  
You can get alcohol now 

****

**Pooter  
** Ohfuckyeah

****

**Hermes  
** Oh boy  
Please be responsible  
I don’t want to find you passed out somewhere 

****

**Pooter  
** No promises 

****

**Ronnie  
** What are you going to do for the big 1-8

****

**Pooter  
** Probably just going to a restaurant with the fam  
Also we’re still meeting at the three broomsticks right?

****

**Ronnie  
** Yeeeahhh boyyy 

****

**Hermes  
** Yeah

****

**Pooter  
** Oof my parents are calling me  
See you guys later  
_______________________

****

**Pooter  
** You pieces of shits I’m still crying 

****

**Ronnie  
** Aw we love you too

****

**Hermes  
** You only turn 18 once 

****

**Pooter  
** G o d  
I love you too so much  
The party was amazing and kudos to you guys for surprising me 

****

**Hermes  
** You’re not that observant 

****

**Ronnie  
** Ooooooooooooooooo

****

**Pooter  
** wOW rUDe  
Well I’m going to go and cry some more  
Byeeee

__________________________

****

**Pooter  
** f U C K  
School is right around the corner 

****

**Ronnie  
** Whythehellwouldyouremindme

****

**Hermes  
** It’s our final year so it’s going to be pretty stressful

****

**Pooter  
** ThANk YoU HErMEs fOr THat LoVELy InFoRMAtION

****

**Ronnie  
** God  
Now I’m even more stressed and school hasn’t even started 

****

**Hermes  
** Everything is going to be fine guys

****

**Ronnie  
** God you optimist

****

**Hermes  
** I wouldn’t say I’m an optimist 

****

**Pooter  
** Clearly  
I’d say you’re more of a realist 

****

**Ronnie  
** You right 

****

**Hermes  
** Well anyways  
Have you two done the summer assignments 

****

**Ronnie  
** Oof no

****

**Pooter  
** We had assignments? Since w h e n 

****

**Ronnie  
** Yeah I kinda forgot about those  
Like do we really have to do them?

****

**Hermes  
** YES

****

**Ronnie  
** Well then I got to go  
I need to do stuff-

****

**Pooter  
** Me2

****

**Hermes  
** …

___________________

****

**Pooter  
** It's been a day and I already want to DIE

****

**Ronnie  
** same 

****

**Hermes  
** I can already feel the stress and its been a day  


****

**Ronnie  
** Do we really have to go to school?  
Cant we drop out

****

**Hermes  
** NO  
YOU CANT

****

**Pooter  
** But what if  
I do

****

**Hermes  
** I swear to God

****

**Ronnie  
** Hermes, my boi  
We are dropping out and you cant stop us

****

**Hermes  
** You both are staying in school  
I cannot suffer alone

****

**Pooter  
** Go d da M n I T

****

**Ronnie  
** Oof but mood


	5. Homework, fights, and secret relationships

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof here I come again with a semi okay chapter  
> Well enjoy the chapter y'all
> 
> (Also the last part in this chapter may be slightly confusing  
> Key-  
> Sugarthot=mystery person who will be revealed at some point  
> Ms. Shortcake=Harry)

****

**Hermes  
** Have you two done the homework for Snape’s class?

****

**Ronnie  
** Ew  
But yes boo

 **Pooter  
** _D I S G U S T I N G_

 **Hermes  
** Okay…  
Well I just wanted to make sure you guys finished it 

****

**Pooter  
** I still have to do the last part but I’ll do it later

****

**Hermes  
** Its due tomorrow Harry

****

**Pooter  
** Dont worry  
I’ll have it done before his class starts

****

**Ronnie  
** Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

****

**Pooter  
** B a ck o f f R o n n ie

****

**Ronnie  
** Hhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

****

**Pooter  
** Ma’am i'm calling the cops

****

**Ronnie  
** Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

****

**Pooter  
** Ma’AM

****

**Ronnie  
** I smell procrastination

****

**Pooter  
** Excuse you I never procrastinate

****

**Hermes  
** Harry you procrastinate like its your job  
You would procrastinate death if you could

****

**Pooter  
** Wow I feel so attacked right now  
I do not deserve this  
But just so you know im going to do the homeworNOT because you guys told me too  
Its my choice

****

**Ronnie  
** Sure mate

****

**Hermes  
** Whatever helps you sleep tonight 

****

**Pooter  
** w o w o k a y  
____________________________

 

****

**Ronnie  
** Harrywhatthehellhappened

****

**Hermes  
** I swear Harriet  
We’ve been in school for 20 days

****

**Pooter  
** In my defense  
It was technically self defense

****

**Ronnie  
** Please explain what happened  
Because the only thing I saw was you uppercut Parkinson  
I mean it was fun to watch dont get me wrong  
But like context?

****

**Hermes  
** How did your parent react?

****

**Pooter  
** They were not happy but I told them the whole story so they were less not happy  
Well to the point where they didn't actually ground me but still gave me a lecture on how violence is never the answer  
If you ask me I think my dad was kinda proud

****

**Roonie  
** C O N T E X T P L E A S E

****

**Pooter  
** Oh right  
Better grab a snack cause its a long story  
Okay so I was going to the loo for obvious reasons and there’s Parkinson in there washing her hands. I paid no attention and did my own thing but Parkinson was still out there when I got out of the stall. At this point I was thinking ‘damn how long does it take to wash your hands’ but then Parkinson starts screeching at me. I havent done anything wrong at this point so I was confused. She was talking about how I was taking her honey away from here and at this point I was super confused. Apparently her ‘honey’ was Draco and because I was being more friendly to him I was trying to take him away which is 1, stupid and 2, we just became friends after years of aggression towards each other. Then she out of nowhere just starts pulling my hair and at this point my flight or fight response kicked in and I started to fight back. We someone ended up out in the hallway and as you two know they had to pull as apart.

****

**Ronnie  
** Oof that's tough

****

**Hermes  
** You were lucky to get a week of detention instead of suspension  
That being said, Parkinson overstepped her boundaries and you were acting out in self defense 

****

**Pooter  
** Thanks

****

**Hermes  
** But please don’t get into more fights

****

**Ronnie  
** Yeah detentions and suspensions would look pretty bad on the transcript

****

**Pooter  
** I make 0 promises

 

______________________  


****

**Sugarthot  
** [Sent an Image]

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** Whatthefuckiswrongwithyou

****

**Sugarthot  
** Excuse you that’s a masterpiece

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** I think that picture is burned into my brain

****

**Sugarthot  
** Its a great photo

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** Its a terrible excuse for a meme

****

**Sugarthot  
** Wow rude

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Sugarthot  
** NOW that's a terrible excuse for a meme

****

**Ms. Shortcake  
** [Sent an image]  
Rude

****

**Sugarthot  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Ms. Shortcake  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Sugarthot  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Sugarthot  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Ms. Shortcake  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Sugarthot  
** hey guess what

****

**Ms. Shortcake  
** What?

****

**Sugarthot  
** I like like you

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** What a coincidence  
I like like you too

****

**Sugarthot  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Ms.Shortcake  
** Why are you like this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O o f who do y'all think 'Sugarthot' is?
> 
> ALSO  
> I won’t be able to update this story until August the 9th since i’m on a trip and I don’t have much wifi here


	6. Memes, cartoons, and dinner dates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof I'm finally back with another semi-okay chapter  
> Hope y'all enjoy the chapter

****

**Hermes  
** Somehow a rabbit found its way into my house and pooped all over the place

****

**Ronnie  
** That’s sad

****

**Pooter  
** That’s so sad, Alexa play despacito 

****

**Ronnie  
** That is despairing, Amazon machine play the famous Spanish song 

****

**Pooter  
** That is sorrowful emotion, virtual assistant developed by Amazon cooperation play Luis Fonsi’s 2017 hit 

****

**Hermes  
** What is wrong with you two

****

**Ronnie  
** It’s modern talk Hermes  
Keep us with the times jfc 

****

**Pooter  
** Yeah Hermes

****

**Hermes  
** I’d rather not 

****

**Pooter  
** Do you even know what a meme is?

****

**Hermes  
** Of course I know what a meme is 

****

**Pooter  
** Mmmmmmmm okay

****

**Hermes  
** Don’t ‘mmmmm’ me 

****

**Pooter  
** Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

**Ronnie  
** I’m surprised you know what a meme is  
I thought you would be like grandpa level in internet society knowledge

****

**Hermes  
** I’m not that oblivious  
Avoiding a meme now is like avoiding the bubonic plague in the 1300s

****

**Ronnie  
** That’s a nice comparison 

****

**Pooter  
** I give it a 9.5/10

****

**Ronnie  
** Wtf why only a 9.5

****

**Pooter  
** Gotta leave room for improvement 

****

**Ronnie  
** Ohshit you’re right 

****

**Hermes  
** [Sent an image]

****

**Pooter  
** oH MY GOD

****

**Ronnie  
** I am so shook  
Hardcore shook  
He knows what memes are  
And the GOOD memes too 

****

**Pooter  
** I feel proud for some reason?

****

**Hermes  
** I swear

****

**Ronnie  
** Mmm talk meme to me 

****

**Pooter  
** n A S T Y  
I have done nothing wrong to deserve this 

****

**Hermes  
** Why are you like this 

****

**Ronnie  
** I’m sorry baby  
I saw the opportunity and I took it 

****

**Pooter  
** Goddamn Ronnie now I need to cleanse myself with holy water to wash the sin away

****

**Ronnie  
** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

****

**Pooter  
** sTOP yOU NAstY

****

**Hermes  
** Why can’t we ever have a normal conversation  
_______________________

****

**Ronnie  
** Does anyone remember Charlie and Lola

****

**Hermes  
** I remember it slightly 

****

**Pooter  
** Nope

****

**Ronnie  
** Well okay  
I just saw a picture of it and I was just hit by nostalgia 

****

**Pooter  
** What was it about?

****

**Ronnie  
** It was about two young siblings and their adventures and stuff

****

**Hermes  
** I remember watching it with the other kids in daycare 

****

**Pooter  
** I never watched it

****

**Ronnie  
** W h a t

****

**Pooter  
** Wasn’t much of a television kid 

****

**Ronnie  
** We’re watching every cartoon now  
You need to catch the heck up 

****

**Pooter  
** Thank you bb 

_____________________

 

The music rang throughout the small restaurant as Ronnie and Hermes waited for their food. They sat near the entrance and were facing each other.

The two talked quietly among themselves as they held hands. As they had more and more dates, they grew more comfortable to get physical. 

“I wouldn’t quite say that-“

“No that’s exactly what you said.” A small laugh erupted from Ronnie’s mouth.

“I didn’t.”

“Yes you did. You said ‘the only thing worse than this food is your personality’ and I have several witnesses.” 

“Oh my god-“

_rinngggg_

Ronnie turned her head slightly to see who caused the small bell in front of the door to ring. Surprisingly it was a familiar black haired girl she knew well. 

“Oh it’s Harry. Wonder what’s she doing here.”

“Maybe she’s on a date?” Ronnie’s eyebrows scrunched together as she thought for a second.

“I feel like she would have told me if she was.”

“Maybe she wanted to keep it to herself?” 

“Yeah, maybe-“ Ronnie stared at their intertwined hands.

“Whatever you’re thinking, no.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“I know you well enough to know what you’re thinking of.”

“Well then please tell me what I was thinking on doing.”

“You’re wanting to spy on Harry to see who she is with.” Ronnie scowled and rolled her eyes.

“No. I was actually just going to ask her about it tomorrow.”

“Whatever you say darling.”  
___________________

When their food finally came they ate in mostly silence. There was a few words spoken but other than that they ate. 

Ronnie, too busy eating almost didn’t notice the food steps heading towards the bathroom that was near them, _almost_. She looked up only to see that it was Harry. 

“Oh hey Harry. Whatcha doing here?” She heard Hermes give a small groan and whisper something under his breath. 

Harry stopped and a small look of fear appeared on her face.

“Oh hey Ronnie, Hermes.” She gave them a small forced smile. “I’m just enjoying dinner...by myself”

“By yourself?” Hermes raised a brow as he questioned her.

“Yes. Just me, myself, and I. Now if you excuse me I need to go to the bathroom-“ they watched as Harry bolted to the bathroom and glanced at each other.

“I haven’t seen her run that fast since the day she found out she was twenty minutes late to Mcgonagall's class.” Ronnie scratched her cheek as she thought. “Now I’m definitely going to question her tomorrow.”

“Yeah, it was quite suspicious. In the meantime can we go back to our date?” 

“Yeah... do you think she realizes she’s going to have to walk past us again when she leaves the bathroom?”


End file.
